Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Homebody

My husband and I both like to get up and go. We have never sat around the house in our pajamas on the weekends. We both have too many things we want to do and see. Especially since having kids and being limited to nap and bedtimes we feel and even bigger pull to get our days going on the weekends. Lately though I am always asking myself why I am so tired and why our schedules are so full. I have been craving just chilling at home. Except I am not really sure how to do it. I am really out of practice.

 Checking errands off your to do list shouldn't mean you are accomplished. There is this race daily to do everything you can humanly possibly get done in one day, resulting in utter exhaustion. I wonder why I am so tired by the end of the day. Sure, I have small kids who get up early, but I am also exercising, reading the news, trying to make healthy food, put together some decent outfits and get out the door all by 8 am. By the time I get to my alone time I typically have just under two hours to check an errand off my list. It not exactly carefree. First I pick up my little one and then a few hours after that I pick up the other one. When we all finally get home it's the homework and dinner club. Just to add a bit more chaos to the mix every few days we have some extra curricular activity to attend to as well. I am beginning to feel like the idea of balance in life is a myth.

I strive to have my life be calmer, less complicated, and less stressful, but there is a fine line between simpler and boring. I have a friend who comes home with her kids everyday after school. No play dates, no activities, they do homework maybe watch some tv eat dinner and go to bed. It works for them. Then I have friends whose kids are in competitive sports or dance, that go two days a week and one day on the weekend. They eat dinner on the fly and I guess do homework before bed. We are somewhere in the middle and there are days where that even feels too much. 

   When I plan out my day, I forget to account for all the distractions. From the minute I wake up I think I have a set amount of time but then a text comes in, or I have to forward an email to my daughters classroom, or my child doesn't want to wear the shoes Ive already tied on. In this day of having cell phones be the biggest addiction I have ever had, I have a love hate relationship with technology.  I think our kids probably hate seeing them in our hands all the time too. I read that using our phones is nit unlike smoking was in the 60's. Just like people learned that smoking was bad for them then we know that using our cell phones can be not only dangerous to talk on near our heads but also a complete distraction from the people closest from us. I read "Hands Free Parenting" and loved the message but I can't put my phone down just like everyone else.  I'm hooked. "Stop The Insanity"

As I sit here and write this, I have stopped so many times due to technological interruptions. I try to over compensate my meditating everyday, but something about this seems so ironic. So I have made a pledge to myself just to be a bit more mindful about being chill. Staying home a little bit more at a time. Taking down time. Playing with my kids, and just being present. I am really enjoying my kids right now. Seven and three are pretty sweet ages. I want to soak them in, with minimal beeps and buzzes to pull me away. Yesterday I took an afternoon walk in the rain with my boy. He was so excited to wear his rain boots. I purposely left the phone at home. It felt good to be free of it, and anyway the rain could have gotten it wet. Then what?