Last week I got an email from a friend that was basically a chain letter, but instead of being for recipes or karma it was for inspirational passages quotes or mantras. The most time-consuming part of doing it was cut and pasting the information and resending it on to a selected group who wouldn't be annoyed at you for getting such an email. I passed on a mantra I heard after having both my babies, "I am safe, I am healthy, I am at ease." My midwife shared it with me, and at the time I was in no way at ease, I repeated it countless times to help myself believe that at least the possibility existed. Feeling safe and healthy weren't my strongest feelings at the time either, and I do believe chanting this to myself helped.
I also received an email from some spiritual newsletter that I mostly delete but for some reason, decided to read this time. It was about how many people are so afraid to do nothing. We busy ourselves all the time so we don't have to be still. It went onto say that being still is hard for most people because it scares them. I never equated fear with my inability to sit still, but I suppose it is possible. After all, so many of us spend so much money to go on vacation to lie down and be still somewhere else. I do feel challenged on days we decide to stay home on the weekends that we won't "do" enough. I am sure I am creating monsters in my kids with the idea that there has to be an activity at all times. I recently been much better at relaxing but it seems counterintuitive that it should take work.
My husband and I talk all the time about where our next move with be. We are obsessed with discovering new houses online and exploring new neighborhoods. We fantasize about owning a house with a pool and guest house, and talk about what amazing new things we could do if only we lived closer to… Since obsessing is something I don't need any practice doing I can spin out on this whole move thing. The truth is that there is nothing we can do right now at all. We haven't even put our home on the market and we are, for the moment, staying here. I also happen to love things about where we are. Walking my daughter to school everyday, walking my boy around the pretty streets, our incredible view, and how idillic it feels here. Sure there are a bunch of reasons that it doesn't work for us but for right now I am choosing to love it. "Bloom where you are planted" as they say. I didn't get that from one of the chain responses but it is fascinating how many of them are all about not worrying, living in the moment, and having faith that it will all work out.