Tuesday, June 18, 2019

Chill Out

Now that the school year is over, and my big work responsibilities are behind me, it's time to relax. I don't know how to, though. I feel the need to busy myself all day, every day. I am a bit better about doing less on the weekends, but still I can't be in my house without seeing things I need to do. I once read a quote about how we are not defined by how many items get checked off our to do list, or something like that, but I can't even remember it. My to do list is everything. If I check things off it, I should be able to something relaxing at the end of it, but I don't feel very successful when getting to that part.

One of the things that I love to do the most is the first thing that takes a backseat and that is reading a book. If things are busy, I don't get to read. I try to make time for it, but I don't stick to keeping it a priority at all. I am so grateful that both my kids love to read and that my little one now reads independently. One of my favorite things to do with my daughter is read our own books side by side. When too many days pass between doing that, I realize I am not slowing down enough.

My husband and I both are not homebodies. We both itch to get out most days, but the kids crave being at home and not being rushed out on days off. When I see them both struggle to motivate on the weekends, I wonder what I am teaching them about relaxing. Just like the distraction of TV or phones, one could argue that keeping children busy all the time doesn't breed creativity either. I am sure I am not leading by example on the benefits of boredom, if I never let any of us get bored. I am a little concerned that if we had a day at home with no plans, that they might not even know what to do. They would both read a book, then I bet they would ask for a bunch of snacks and then the next question would be, "What are we doing today?"

Over-planning a day is a great skill of mine. The lack of hours in the day gets me all the time. I want to stuff more and more in a day, because I have too many things I want to do. Life is short, so I want the most juice for the squeeze. I do not think I am going about this the right way though. I do believe I am doing my kids a bit of a disservice by not giving them more downtime. There is only one way to find out. Summertime and all the downtime that comes with it. If staying home means I have to make more snacks, quell more arguing and fend off begging for TV, then I am making plans. Big plans.

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