Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Forget Me Not

I can't forget who I was before I had this little girl.

I love her more than I can even try to articulate, and she now holds the majority of my heart in her hands. I did have a lot of other passions before she came along, and I don't even remember how much I loved them too. There really doesn't seem to be quite as much time in the day as there used to be and as I type this I can see on my video monitor,that this here bit of me time is about to come to an end. There is still a lot of fun to be had and though by night fall I am typically exhausted, every once and a while I push myself to get out and I almost never regret it.

I am grateful to be someone who found a career I was passionite about. I loved every job I ever had, and couldn't believe I was making money for enjoying myself the way I was. I worked in theater, the film and television industry, I was a fitness instructor, a figure skating instructor, personal trainer and worked with children in all of the above areas. I had the best time. I didn't always get every job I ever wanted but I can say I have had great opportunities in my life. The job I am holding currently as a mother is the one I have pined after the most and is the only one I really care about holding onto forever, I just know that I am not done with the other ones yet either.

This past week has been a fun one. I went with my husband to go indoor skydiving. It was a crazy wild time. It pushed us out of our comfort zone and into a wind tunnel where we had to get into the right position to take flight. We both had the best time, and it was so good to do something so different than what I do on a daily basis now. I love adrenaline rushes and it had been too long since I had one. Last night we went to hear one of my favorite new artists play, and she rocked! We didn't get home until after one and as tired as I am today, it was worth it. She is in her twenties and giving everything she has to making this career happen for her. She is an incredible talent and it shows. She has both a huge voice and presence on stage and it is amazing to watch. Her show was upbeat at times and very moving at others. She emanates emotions in such an intense way. I could feel her drive and it made me miss mine.

I am very happy in the present moment, and I would never give up this time with my girl. I also love hanging out with my friends, being out with my husband, having adult interactions and having career success. Most of these I can do right now. The last one might not happen this second but I now it will again, and I will try not to forget that again.

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